Broccoli-f... what?

The people on Hell BBS know this, but I've decided to share with the world. I curse.

Oh, sure, the occasional 'fuck' pops up in my vocabulary (It truly is a useful word, and wonderfully purging,) but typically, I don't like limiting myself to the handful of mundane curses.

So when I encountered the offensively useless tech on Dell support yesterday, I got a little hot under the collar, hopped onto Hell, and started in:

No, I'm sorry that you're a maggot-brained, broccoli-felching idiot who couldn't find his ass with a map and a flashlight, but that doesn't mean I'm going to jump through all of your hoops on your say-so.
Find me a manager if you can't find your ass.

Windows 2000 cds do *not* boot to Dos, ass-wipe.

I was upset. I became more upset.

Two attempts and you can't find a manager?
Apparently the part of dumbass you can't understand is ass, which is really baffling, considering you are one, and a gigantic ass at that. No wonder you have a hard time with maps, when you really just need a mirror.
Carpet-munching, goat-fucking, camel-raping, shit-for-brains, anal-retentive, simpering excuse for a waste of molecules that compose the walking corpse that is your being.

Fuck that. My time and my sanity are more valuable than this.


That's about when I hung up on the guy.

I'm rather proud of the broccoli-felching.